Amazing Catechists

Teaching and learning the faith together

Sacrament Review

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The end of the school year is approaching

And it can be hard to keep your group interested in learning. Here is a fun activity that will review all seven sacraments and keep your class involved. It can be done with families as well, each family being a group.

Here is the general outline of the lesson:

Materials for the lesson:  large pictures of each sacrament, each sacrament name written on a large piece of paper (I used 11×17 paper and printed out the names using Publisher and clip art.), 1 large chalice/host drawing, about 3’ high, crayons, pencils, markers, glue

Points to get across:  Sacraments are signs we can see, hear, feel, taste, and smell.  God gave them to us through Jesus so that we could remember him and all the gifts he gave us.  All sacraments give us grace to help us live our lives.  Grace is another gift from God.

Activity:

Call up 7 children to help while the groups at tables write down the names of each of the sacraments.

How many sacraments are there?  7.   Have those left at tables write down the names of the sacraments, one person per group writing.

Part 1:  Distribute the names of the sacraments and the pictures and have the children match them up with their backs to the group.  Once they are all matched up, ask for the names of the 7 sacraments.  As each is named, have the person holding the sacrament name and picture step forward.

Part 2:

Have each table choose one person to be a runner.  The group listens to the statement/question, and the runner will go to the sacrament described after conferring with the table on an answer.

Possible Questions: (Add more depending on the size, and attention span of the group)

Takes away Original sin

We say we are sorry for our sins

One man and one woman become a family

We receive Jesus’ body and blood

The Bishops seals you with the Holy Spirit

This sacrament helps you when you are sick

A man who is ordained receives this sacrament

What is the most important sacrament?

Points to make:

Eucharist is the source and summit of the Catholic life.  It is our food for our journey.  Its purpose is to make us one with Jesus Christ, to help us to live like him, and to form us into a community.  That is why we come to Mass, to celebrate together while thanking God for all he has given us, including and most especially his Son.

As St. Paul tells us in 2 Corinthians, all members of the body are necessary and valuable.  When one part of the body is hurting because of sin or sickness, it hurts all of us.  If a part of the body is missing, we all suffer.  That is yet another reason why we need to come together at Mass each week.

Activity:

One in Christ:  pass out 4×6 pieces of paper and markers, crayons, and pencils; one piece to each family.  Have each group think about an appropriate symbol to put on the paper.  It can be a symbol of a sacrament, something special to the family, or abstract.  It should not include words.  Very little white space should be seen. All need to participate in the coloring in some way.

Note: you may need to make the paper size larger depending on the size of your group; the idea is to cover the large chalice as completely as possible. 

Once everyone is done, have one person from each group come forward and put it on the large chalice, covering it like a collage.

 

Printable Worksheets on the Sacrament of Matrimony #freebie #4KEYS

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turning-good-marriages-into-glory-canva-graphic

This is number two in a series of downloadable worksheets to use at home, in small groups, or during break-out sessions with our Catholic marriage advice book, The Four Keys to Everlasting Love. This week, we’re focusing on the sacraments and the saints.  You can follow along with us in the 4 Keys Online Book Club on Facebook. TO DOWNLOAD AND PRINT, CLICK HERE.

Chapter 2 Worksheet

Turning Good Marriages into Pathways to Glory:
It’s a Sacrament; It’s a Vocation; It’s a Road Map to Heaven!

Marriage can be good. With effort, it can be very good. But it takes God to make the union glorious. The graces of the Sacrament of Matrimony are a powerful aid to couples in their everyday struggles and in times of great crisis.

Nowadays, fewer Catholics are choosing to get married in the Church than at any other time in recent history. Many people don’t realize what a wonderful treasure Catholic marriage is! As Manny and Karee explain in Chapter Two of The Four Keys, “couples united in the Sacrament of Matrimony have been blessed with the grace to take natural love to a supernatural level.  … [T]hey are called and empowered to love to the highest degree, the degree that Christ loved us – to forgive seventy times seven times, to do the humblest chore out of love, and to die to self in order to live and love for others.”

In Chapter Two, Manny and Karee describe marriage’s role as one of the seven sacraments, the difference between a valid and invalid marriage, and the importance of the vocation of marriage. They also reveal how the saints, our cheering section in the next life, are willing and eager to help husbands and wives get each other to heaven. From this chapter, you will learn how to:

  • Seek help from the sacraments
  • Seek help from the saints
  • Discern God’s voice
  • Be faithful in little things and let God turn them into glory

Conversation Starters

You can use the following conversation starters to get a discussion going among yourselves or in a small group. If it helps, think it over on your own time, take it to prayer, and jot down your answers before talking about them.

1. Why did you choose each other? How did you know you had found the “one”?

 

2. Why did you decide in favor of (or against) getting married in the Catholic Church?

 

3. How have you seen the graces of the sacrament at work in your lives and in your relationship?

 

4. Who do you think has an exceptionally good marriage and why? Do you have a favorite married saint who would be a good role model?

 

Free Marriage Memes for Social Media Sharing

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A picture is worth a thousand words, they say, and that’s especially true on Facebook. Social media is extremely image-driven. To evangelize through that medium, you need a short pithy statement and a dynamite image. So, to spread the message of the good news about Catholic marriage, I’ve prepared a series of memes to go with each chapter of my book The Four Keys to Everlasting Love.

Chapter One focuses on overcoming the differences that divide spouses so that two may become one. Each of these memes is based on content from Chapter One. Feel free to download them and share them widely.

Meme #1: Catechism

4-keys-catechism-ch-1-meme

 

Meme #2: Scripture

4-keys-scripture-new-ch-1-meme

 

Meme #3: Quote from Four Keys

4-keys-quote-ch-1-meme

 

Meme #4: Action Plan

4-keys-action-plan-ch-1-meme

Marriage Rx: The Free eBook!

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Marriage Rx 50 Quotes Cover

50 Inspirational Quotes to Make Your Marriage Better Today

We’re so pleased to share a free eBook with subscribers to our newsletter.  In our newsletter, you’ll find encouraging articles, helpful tips, and updates on our book The Four Keys to Everlasting Love: How Your Catholic Marriage Will Bring You Joy for a Lifetime (available for pre-order here!).

Catechists, please take note! Our book does have the imprimatur, or permission to print, from the bishop of the Diocese of Rockville Centre, New York. So it is a trustworthy resource for marriage preparation, marriage renewal, and adult faith formation ministries.

Our free Marriage Rx eBook is meant to touch your heart and show you how God’s everlasting love can improve your married life today and every day. We’ve included quotes from diverse sources like Shakespeare and the Bible, plus excerpts from many Can We Cana? posts, especially the popular series How to Stay Married 10 Years & Then Some. You can click through to the full posts, if you wish — we’ve provided the links right inside the eBook.

Inside you’ll find useful and uplifting guidance on:

  • The ABCs of Communication
  • Work & Money
  • Friends, Family & Forgiveness
  • God & Prayer
  • Saints, Suffering & Sacrifice

Ready to be inspired?

For your free eBook, click here!

May God bless you and your marriages!

Yours in Christ,

Dr. Manuel and Karee Santos

Top Tips for a Joy-Filled Marriage

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God's Plan for Joy-Filled Marriage picMy husband Manuel P. Santos M.D. and I had an awesome time last weekend giving a presentation to around 40 couples in the Archdiocese of Newark on how to live God’s Plan for a Joy-Filled Marriage. This great pre-Cana program covers the topics of sacramentality and sexuality, and it’s chock full of quotes from Pope St. John Paul II’s Theology of the Body and his book Love and Responsibility. I gave the talk on the Wedding at Cana (one of my favorite Bible stories), and Manny gave the talk on the Church’s definition of marriage, annulments and impediments to marriage.

As is true in any large group, there was a wide range of knowledge and interest. Not everyone had heard the story of the Wedding at Cana, and some people were more familiar with the fictitious marriage of Jesus and Mary Magdalen than the mystical marriage between Jesus and the Church. It was truly a privilege to be the first ones to introduce some of these people to the beautiful theology of Catholic marriage.

The Joy-Filled Marriage program is given several times a year, and attendees are always given the opportunity to place anonymous questions in a question box. Here are some of the most common issues and our top tips for dealing with them.

1.  The “Inter-Faith” Question

My fiance and are are of different faiths.  What problems might we encounter, and how do we have a successful inter-faith marriage?

  • The biggest problems that many inter-faith couples face are celebrating holidays and passing their faith on to their children.
  • Religious holidays can be celebrated at home as well as in church (or at temple). Customize your at-home celebrations to reflect aspects of both faith traditions.
  • When couples get married in the Church, the Catholic spouse needs to promise to raise the children in the Catholic faith. Discuss before the wedding how that promise affects church attendance, school attendance, and participation in religious milestones like First Communion or Confirmation. Don’t sweep the issue under the rug.

2.  The “Communication” Question

What are the best ways to improve our communication?

  • Don’t roll your eyes or slam doors.
  • If you can’t talk about it calmly, write it down instead.
  • Never let the sun go down on your anger. Give your spouse a hug or kiss of forgiveness before bedtime, and tomorrow begin again!

3. The “First Year” Question

What was the toughest part of the first year of marriage?

  • Sometimes couples with the best relationships encounter severe crises in the first year (we faced fears of infertility, death of a close family member, and the diagnosis of Manny’s first brain tumor). Don’t let it get you down.
  • Friends might complain that you spend less time with them than before. Make it clear that your top priority is your spouse.
  • You might be tempted to spend less time at work. Give in!

4.  The “Sexual Frustration” Question

If we choose to save sex for marriage, how do we deal with the unmet physical desire?

  • Amp up the romance. Channel the frustration into loving, non-physical demonstrations of affection.
  • Stay far away from temptation — don’t play with fire!
  • If you give in, go to confession. If you give in again, go to confession again.

5.  The “In-Law” Question

My fiance has family that get into our personal business and I feel like they influence him/her more than I do sometimes.  Am I wrong to be upset?  What can be done?

  • Let your fiance know how much this bothers you. Agree to set firm but loving boundaries between you and both of  your families.
  • You and your fiance can listen respectfully and thank family members for their advice, while making it clear that the final decision is between the two of you as a couple.
  • Realize that what your in-laws really want in most cases is for you and your fiance to be happy.

Does your diocese use God’s Plan for a Joy-Filled Marriage? If you work in marriage ministry or adult faith formation, what are the most common questions you hear? Please let me know in the comments.

13 Resources on Sacramental Marriage for Everyone from Newbies to Catechists

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Girl with glasses reading book

Catholic schoolchildren learn that marriage is one of the seven sacraments, but no one seems to understand what that really means. Yes, marriage — as a sacrament — is an outer sign of an inner grace, but that doesn’t explain much to most people. The catchphrase “free, faithful, fruitful, and forever” says more about what spouses do for a marriage than what marriage does for the spouses.

I like how my spiritual director says it best — it’s all about the graces! With a sacramental marriage come beautiful graces of state that empower us to live the life to which God called us and live it to the fullest. That’s what the Sacrament of Matrimony offers husbands and wives married in the Church, “sealed by a blessing, announced by angels, and ratified by the Father” (CCC 1642).

For anyone interested in exploring what the sacrament of marriage means and the difference it can make to husbands and wives, there are plenty of video and print resources for everyone from theology newbies to experienced catechists.

For Theology Newbies

1. Marriage: Love and Life in the Divine Plan, 2009 pastoral letter from the U.S.Council of Catholic Bishops, downloadable pdf available free at the bishops’ web site (also in Spanish)

2.  Saying I Do: What Happens at a Catholic Wedding, streaming video resource from the U.S. Council of Catholic Bishops, available free at the bishops’ web site

3. When Two Become One, a DVD starring yours truly and 3 other couples, plus explanation by a priest. Available for purchase here. Watch a clip on my blog’s About Me page here.

4. Dr. Greg and Lisa Popcak, Just Married: The Catholic Guide to Surviving and Thriving in the First Five Years of Marriage (Ave Maria Press, 2013). By a popular Catholic psychologist and his wife.

5. Couples in Love: Straight Talk on Dating, Respect, Commitment, Marriage, and Sexuality, by Fr. John R. Waiss (Crossroad Pub. 2003). By my former spiritual director. Structured as a conversation between a dating couple and a priest.

For Theology Buffs

6. Bishop Fulton J. Sheen, Three to Get Married (Scepter Pubs., 1996). Originally published in 1951. A spiritual classic.

7. Scott Hahn, First Comes Love: The Family in the Church and the Trinity (Random House, 2002). Who doesn’t like Scott Hahn?

8. Christopher West, Good News about Sex & Marriage: Revised Edition (Servant Books, 2004; updated 2007). Detailed, specific, and clear.

9. William May, Marriage: The Rock on Which the Family is Built, 2d ed. (Ignatius Press, 2009). Includes Pope John Paul II’s Letter to Families.

10. Cormac Burke, Covenanted Happiness: Love and Commitment in Marriage (Scepter Pubs., 1999). With forward by Dr. Janet E. Smith.

For Catechists

11. Ramón García De Haro, Marriage and the Family in the Documents of the Magisterium: A Course in the Theology of Marriage, (Ignatius Press, 1993).  Translated by William May. Academic and pretty heavy going. Helps if you already have familiarity with the main documents.

12. Tim Muldoon & Cynthia S. Dobrzynski, eds., Love One Another: Catholic Reflections on Sustaining Marriages Today (The Church in the 21st Century), (Crossroad Pub., 2010).  A collection of essays including advice on how to rescue marriage prep from its current disastrous state.

13. Mary Amore, Helping Your Marriage Survive the Call to Ministry, Ministry & Liturgy Magazine,  vol 32, no.1, (Feb. 2005). Great for any married person involved in ministry or catechesis. Call 408-286-8505 for back issues or reprints.

Make Babies

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6th-grade catechism class naturally covers a lot of Catholic themes during its year-long trip through the Bible. One of them is marriage and children. I don’t ever stand in front of the kids and say, “marriage and babies are good, and divorce and abortion are bad,” I let them figure it out as we go, helped along with personal testimony from me. I don’t intend to form consciences; but I do intend to create the opportunity for the kids to form their own consciences themselves.

Here’s a list of Bible bits that kids learn about and discuss, my intent being to help them develop a Catholic worldview without being didactic about it. (I could give you chapter and verse, but it’s better to do that yourself):

1. Creation. God’s last and greatest creation is a man and a woman together, creating babies. But not just any man and woman, a husband and wife, a marriage: one man, one rib, one woman, one flesh.

2. After all, the first commandment is to “be fruitful and multiply,” more pithily expressed in class as “make babies.”

3. The Flood. As soon as Noah steps out of the Ark, God reminds him and his family of the first commandment: “Be fruitful and multiply.”

4. Abraham and Sarah become the parents of a nation.

5. To accomplish #4, Abraham and Sarah have a miraculous pregnancy. They’re so happy that their love has at last made a baby that they name him Laughter.

6. Pagan peoples living around Abraham kill their own firstborn children and offer them to strange gods, but God doesn’t require that of Abraham right off. But when God does ask for Isaac’s sacrifice, Abraham must feel as though he’s been asked to kill all the laughter and joy in his life.

7. Isaac and Rebecca have a miraculous pregnancy, and Rebecca bears Esau and Jacob.

8. Jacob and Rachel have a miraculous pregnancy, and Rachel bears Joseph.

9. Manoah and his wife have a miraculous pregnancy, and she bears Samson.

10. Elkhanah and Hannah have a miraculous pregnancy, and Hannah bears Samuel.

11. Psalm 78 says God “appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers to teach to their children; 6 that the next generation might know them, the children yet unborn, and arise and tell them to their children, so that they should set their hope in God.” So even kids not yet born or even conceived still matter to God.

12. In Psalm 128, David reflects on the joy of family: “Your wife will be like a fruitful vine within your house; your children will be like olive shoots around your table.”

13. Israel falls on hard times, and some parents kill their babies to appease Molech: “Are you not children of transgression, the offspring of deceit, you who burn with lust among the oaks, under every green tree; who slay your children in the valleys, under the clefts of the rocks?”

14. But God still loves his children in both fatherly and motherly ways: “Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you. Behold, I have graven you on the palms of my hands.”

15. God knew Jeremiah, and had a job for him before his mom was even pregnant: “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations.”

16. Baby-killing continues in Jeremiah’s day: “Stand in the gate of the LORD’s house, and say, Hear the word of the LORD, all you men of Judah who enter these gates to worship the LORD. Thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel,”I will let you dwell in this place if you truly execute justice one with another, if you do not oppress the alien, the fatherless or the widow, or shed innocent blood in this place, and if you do not go after other gods to your own hurt. The people have forsaken me, and have profaned this place by burning incense in it to other gods; and because they have filled this place with the blood of innocents, and have built the high places of Baal to burn their sons in the fire as burnt offerings to Baal.” The kids figure out on their own how such passages relate to abortion.

17. Zechariah and Elizabeth have a miraculous pregnancy, and Elizabeth bears John.

18. Mary has the most miraculous pregnancy, and bears Jesus.

This is not an exhaustive list, just the things we have time for in catechism class. By the time we get to Mary, the children can place her at the end of a line of mothers that stretches all the way back to Eve; and have acquired a holistic Scriptural basis for a pro-life conscience.

pregnant

Register Now for Online Marriage Enrichment Retreats!!

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Sacred Heart Immaculate Heart

Looking for ways to make your marriage stronger?

Join me this February 3, 4, 10, or 11 in an online marriage enrichment retreat. Spend an hour or two, just in time for Valentine’s Day, to make your marriage stronger! Similar to an interactive webinar, the retreat offers talks illustrated by sacred artwork with a background of Gregorian chant.

If you’ve never attended an online retreat before, don’t worry — the technology is easy. All you need is high-speed Internet and speakers for your computer. You can ask and answer questions simply by typing in a chatbox. But if you wish, you can purchase low-cost earbuds with a computer mike and speak directly with me and the other participants. You’ll receive a link by email to enter the online environment and a friendly tech will help you get used to all the features.

You can participate as an individual or a couple, during the early afternoon or in the evening — whatever works for you. And if you can’t join live, you’ll have access to the recorded session through a link we’ll send you. Watch it just like you’d watch an online video.

We’ll have sessions on two different topics and would love to see you at both. To register for either session, click here. For more info on the great folks producing this retreat, click here and here.

I. Life-giving Unity: Becoming One with Your Spouse and Your Children

The marital relationship is the bedrock of any family. Reignite your appreciation for your spouse, and let your renewed unity strengthen your relationship with your children as well. Learn how to communicate better, pray more together, and grow closer to God together.

Mid-day Session: Monday, Feb. 3, at 12:30-1:30 pm EST
Evening Session: Tuesday, Feb. 4, at 7:30-8:30 pm EST

II. Holy Stewards: Making the Most of Your Time and Your Money

We all struggle to find enough time for work, family, and God. We might also sometimes let worries over money and professional advancement affect our marital relationship. Maintaining a good balance is difficult, but not impossible. Explore useful ways to make the most of what you have.

Mid-day Session: Monday, Feb. 10, at 12:30-1:30 pm EST
Evening Session: Tuesday, Feb. 11, at 7:30-8:30 pm EST

Cost: $ 10 for one session, $15 for both.

A Downton Abbey Lesson

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downton abbeyThe French proverb, “The more things change the more they stay the same,” seems to be very appropriate for the hugely popular show on PBS of the post-Edwardian era in England, Downton Abbey.  Something that struck me about a recent episode is that the quest for happiness can often lead one away from the very thing one is searching for.  Lady Edith Crawley allows herself to be swept up into a romance with Michael Gregson, whose wife is considered insane, but British law will not allow him to divorce (presuming he has every right to do so).  He’s going to great lengths to prove his love to Lady Edith by becoming a German citizen so he can divorce his wife and marry her. This example is just one among so many others of how we can distort truth.  The world back then and now too often sees fidelity in marriage to be good so long as your wife is not, as in the case of Mrs. Gregson, insane (or a number of other reasons).

Catechetical Takeaway 

3 catechetical points that are vital to catechesis in the Third Millennium:

1. Proclaiming the truth (whether on the issue of marriage or another aspect of life)  is essential to the freedom of God’s children.  Sometimes the truth is seen as judgmental because it challenges one’s freedom and what is often socially acceptable (although not morally acceptable).

2. Keep in mind that catechesis on “Life in Christ” is not merely “morality” but about life with God.  The Catechism of the Catholic Church, paragraph 1691, says:

“Christian, recognize your dignity and, now that you share in God’s own nature, do not return to your former base condition by sinning. Remember who is your head and of whose body you are a member. Never forget that you have been rescued from the power of darkness and brought into the light of the Kingdom of God.” [St. Leo the Great Sermo 22 in nat. Dom., 3: PL 54, 192C] [790]

3. Let your message be clear.  Paragraph 1697 of the Catechism goes onto say that “Catechesis has to reveal in all clarity the joy and the demands of the way of Christ.”  The demands of being a doctor, a professional sports player, or a renowned scientist are quite high and so also are the demands of the Christian life (which so often we can resist because it is perceived that a loving God should help make our lives good and happy).  The Christian life, although having its challenges, is filled with abundant joy, peace beyond understanding, transforming grace, and total charity, which brings authentic freedom and true happiness.

The life we’ve been given is a true gift even with all it’s demands.  May our eyes and heart always look to Christ for the ultimate answers that allow us to respond according to the truth of the Gospel and all that entails.

Catholic Marriage Support Blog Celebrates First Year

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On Decemlogober 2, 2012, I started the Can We Cana? blog on a wing and a prayer, hoping to provide support for Catholic marriages and families. Thanks to you wonderful readers, the blog reached its 1000th pageview in less than two months. By its one-year anniversary, the blog has attracted more than 30,000 pageviews from readers in all 50 states and in countries around the globe.

Blogpost topics have included everything from sexuality and the Theology of the Body to staying married through sickness and health, unexpected pregnancies, first-year disillusionment, and the pressures of raising a big family. There are parenting tips, household tips, and reviews of awesome Catholic family resources. I’ve even included discussions of difficult issues like marital abandonment, abortion, annulment, virginity, and rape. Thanks to the support of some amazing on-line friends I’ve made, Can We Cana? posts have also appeared on CatholicMom.com, CatholicLane.com, AmazingCatechists.com, MercatorNet.com (Australia), and MyYearofFaith.com.

Here’s a run-down of the posts you liked the best, and a request — tell me what else you’d most like to read about here!

 

Top 5 Most Popular Posts

 

1. Chaste Sex: Not What You Think It Is (more than 1200 views)

2. The One-Year Itch

3. When Sex is Too Much Bother: Japan’s Troubling Celibacy Syndrome

4. Pope Francis Makes Me Ashamed

5. Letting Your Child Go with God: A First Communion Story

 

Most Popular Guest Post

 

Why We Still Use NFP When We’re So Bad at It by James B of RealCatholicLoveandSex.com

 

Post with Highest Critical Acclaim


Theology Professor Endorses My Book

 

Post with the Most Comments

 

The Terrors of the 7th Grade Dance

 

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Many blessings on all of you for helping this Catholic marriage support community grow. If there are any topics you’d like to hear more about, please let me know in the comments!