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“Go and Sin No More”

By Maureen Smith

Brueghel_II,_Pieter_-_Christ_and_the_Woman_Taken_in_Adultery_1600As I reflected on this Sunday’s Gospel, the words of Jesus to the woman caught in adultery struck me. “Go, and from now on do not sin anymore.”

What must it have been like for this woman who was known for and identified by her sin? When Jesus forgives her she stands as a new creation, freed from her past.

Nevertheless, Jesus is aware that, while she is cleansed of her sin, she will encounter the same temptations, the same situations, and the same people and therefore cautions her and instructs her very clearly.

Jesus does not gloss over the fact that she has sinned. But he does look upon her with a gentle and merciful gaze because he wants to heal her from the harm wrought in her soul by sin. He desires to free her from the clutches of the evil one and give her the grace to follow the path God has for her.

We are given these same instructions every time we leave the confessional and after Mass to “go and sin no more.” In fact, they are of particular significance during our Lenten journey, a season of repentance and conversion of heart.

Jesus does not condemn us but he does take our sins seriously. He died for them, after all! He does not desire perfection for its own sake, but for our own freedom, that we might be restored to our original dignity and be drawn closer to His Sacred Heart.

But what if we don’t feel ready to change? What if we are not sorry? If you think you are the only person who struggles with these problems and questions, know that you have at least one other friend out there who finds herself in the midst of this struggle.

Fortunately, we don’t have to rely on ourselves to conquer our resistance to grace! The words of Jesus in today’s Gospel remind us that we are not bound by our past. Jesus’ redemptive and transformative grace is more powerful than if we had never sinned, because “God proves his love for us in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8). This kind of healing love is the answer to our feeble hearts.SantCompostela25

Few people know that the Sacrament of Confession is a healing Sacrament. Only recently did I come to know this  fact. So, sometimes when I approach the confessional, knowing that my heart is not “firmly resolved to sin no more” but willing it to be, I confess this state of my soul and ask for the healing necessary to be free from whatever is holding me back from doing the will of God and from letting go of my attachment to sin.

As we see in the image of the woman caught in adultery, the Lord comes to us, his children, as we are, knowing our sinfulness and our inability to choose the narrow path over what is easy. He not only forgives us but gives us a share in his power to resist temptation and choose life.

Puerta_de_acceso_al_Ex_Convento_de_San_CayetanoThis invitation by Jesus to start anew reminded me of the following passage from the Old Testament that I encourage you to take to heart during your Lenten pilgrimage.

“I have set before you life and death, the blessing and the curse. Choose life, then, that you and your descendants may live, by loving the Lord your God, obeying his voice, and holding fast to him” (Deut 30: 19b, 20a).

The next time you enter the presence of the Blessed Sacrament or the Confessional, consider asking the Lord for this healing, to choose life.

When you leave Mass or exit the Confessional and hear those beautiful words of the priest, “go in peace,” remember the words of Jesus in the Gospel today and remember that his healing and grace is with you.

Read all posts by Maureen Smith Filed Under: Campus Ministry, Catechetics, Culture, Evangelization, Featured, General, Liturgical, Prayer, Sacraments, Scripture, Theology Tagged With: confession, Forgiveness, Gaze of Mercy, Jesus, Mass, mercy, Sacrament, scripture, Woman caught in adultery

Letting Go of Our Nets: A Journey with Peter

By Maureen Smith

The Call

The_Calling_of_Saints_Peter_and_Andrew_-_Caravaggio_(1571-1610)Yesterday morning I took the walk of shame down the side aisle of the Chapel, 5 minutes late and we were already at the Gospel. Frustrated and feeling confirmation that I was definitely a failure at absolutely everything if I couldn’t even make it to Mass on time, I then listened to the Gospel and underneath my gritted teeth felt a sense of relief and the first sign of a smile since yesterday. Having experienced a personal failure a week ago (joining the ranks of the unemployed), I felt comforted by the life and example of Peter.

In the Call of Peter in Mark’s Gospel, which we read yesterday, Jesus clarifies Peter’s vocation and asks him to leave behind what he thought defined him for a life of intimacy and trust in the Lord rather than in the success of the work of his hands.

Similarly, in Luke’s account of the Call of Peter, Jesus uses a moment of failure (on the part of Peter to provide fish after working all night) to reveal His identity as the Son of God while also challenging Peter to discover his own identity, not as a fisherman but as Jesus calls him in Matthew, Mark, and Luke, a “fisher of men.” John’s Gospel recounts a somewhat different, but not inconsistent, first encounter. Here Jesus also reveals to Peter (then Simon) his identity by renaming him Cephas (Peter).

Let It Go!

The_Denial_of_Saint_Peter-Caravaggio_(1610)

As we see in our scriptural pilgrimage, it takes Peter a while to really let go of what he thinks constitutes his identity, as well as his ideas of the Messiah and how His glory should be manifested. We see this when he fails to walk on water, when he rebukes Jesus for predicting his crucifixion, and when he denies Jesus three times.

He may have left behind his fisherman’s nets but there are still many figurative nets holding him back from receiving the truth of his identity as well as what it means to be an Apostle, probably because he is unable to believe the totality of Jesus’s identity which He holds unfolds (albeit sometimes cryptically) to Peter and the others.

Nets

So often we, too, link our accomplishments and the outcomes of our efforts to our identity so that, if and when they fail to measure up to our standards or those of others, we judge ourselves to be inadequate and are quickly overtaken by tidal waves of unworthiness. We assess ourselves by how productive work was, the number on the scale, the number of miles we ran, positive feedback, approval of others, or any other combination of worldly measures of success. It is not wrong that we have aspirations, but it is not true that these standards have any bearing on our identity and worthiness of God’s love and mercy. What are the “nets” we cling to for a sense of acceptance and worthiness that, although they may be part of our calling, are not essential to our identity? Do we need to put them down as Jesus instructs Peter in the Gospels of Mark and Matthew? Or do we need to trust in Jesus’s intercession and instruction as we see in Luke?

Do we struggle to put down these nets because we have a hard time believing in Jesus as truly God, as truly more powerful than our little mistakes or failures to “make something of ourselves?” Yes we can know the truth intellectually, but do we really believe in Jesus, in His power and authority over sin and death, and in the truth that our identity comes from Him rather than our accomplishments or lackthereof?

When Our Nothingness Encounters God’s Mercy

St._Peter_Preaching_at_PentecostWhen we experience failure before the Lord we can become afraid and the shame we feel can be a barrier to further intimacy with him. But these encounters with our weaknesses are often the point of entry for the Lord, just as they were teaching moments and opportunities for Peter.

I think often of how ashamed Peter must have felt in Luke’s account of the Call of Peter. He would have felt a similar sense of failure throughout his journey with  Jesus, however, Jesus uses these opportunities to fill the emptiness in Peter’s heart with His light and truth, which Peter will more fully embrace at Pentecost.

Saint Therese’s thoughts on this passage, recorded in Divine Intimacy by Father Gabriel of Saint Mary Magdalene, give us a refreshing outlook on what Jesus can do with our failures. She writes, “Had the Apostle caught some small fish, perhaps our divine Master would not have, worked a miracle; but he had caught nothing, and so through the power and goodness of God his nets were soon filled with great fishes. Such is Our Lord’s way. He gives as God, with divine generosity, but He insists on humility of heart.”

512px-Rubens_B116In her italics, Therese shows us the keys (no pun intended) to how Peter learned to follow the Lord. We will often find ourselves in the “nothing” stage. This is where the Lord’s grace is most efficacious. However, she warns that He “insists on humility of heart.” This means that we must, like Peter, let go of our fear of failure and put our whole trust in the Jesus and let him be Who He says He is, God!

Now imagine how Jesus looked at Peter in his moments of failure, for example, after a full night of reeling in net after net of nothing. Or when Jesus, after His Resurrection asks Peter if he loves Him. His gaze must have been quite the opposite of Peter’s inward gaze of self-judgment, which actually distorts his perception of how Jesus sees him.

As was the case with Peter, Jesus looks upon our failures with mercy, not with shame, impatience, disgust, etc. He may not immediately reveal His glory in our failures, that usually takes time. We may not reel in a miraculous abundance of tangible goods. Most of our failures will probably require at least a bit of waiting and trusting that eventually Jesus will use this emptiness or failure for His glory and His plan for our welfare…not woe.

Spoiler Alert! (We Will Live Happily Ever After)

Peter, whose blunders are so frequent in the Gospels, shows us that we too can achieve greatness. His ministry most likely did not feel or look successful. It looked much like that of Christ whose life and ministry was looked upon as a failure up until the Resurrection. So also our lives may appear to be lacking in value, but if we remain under the gaze of Jesus and strive to live in the truth of our identity as Children of God, we will achieve the greatest success, sainthood.

Someday, in Heaven, we will hopefully be able chat with Peter, praise God, and laugh about our failures which were transformed into our greatest moments of sanctity. We might feel like we are currently getting a poor return for our efforts, but trust in the example of Peter, it’s worth the struggle!

Genderkingen_2011-05-09_(4)

Read all posts by Maureen Smith Filed Under: Bible Stories, Campus Ministry, Culture, Evangelization, General, Prayer, Scripture, Vocations Tagged With: bible, Call of Peter, encounter, encounter with Jesus, faith, Fisher of Men, Fisherman, Gaze of Mercy, Gospel, Heaven, hope, Identity, keys, Love, mercy, ministry, mission, nets, prayer, Saint Peter, saints, scripture, Vocation

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